Earlier this week, I shared a Facebook note that calls upon my friends (and you, dear reader) to assist with resources, donations, and some amount of assistance so that I can avoid eviction and can be self-supporting again.
Instead of merely typing out my ‘needs’ here’s a review of my best-case scenario, as outlined in the note:
Best-case scenario is for me to come into some income on a regular basis, x amount a week or month, doing work I like doing.
I’m currently seeking employment of an administrative/research or general support nature, within Philadelphia and a 10-20 mile radius, commutable via bus/train/trolley from home, up to 90 minutes. I’m seeking salary of $20k, or $10/hour, it’s equivalent.
Beyond work, here are the elements of my life that I want to experience:
*Furthering of my radio program (Radio Crystal Blue). I have aspirations that mean to give the show more of a physical home than it presently does. I want a proper studio space to house a computer, mixer, radio equipment and the hundreds of CDs that I put in use here. The studio would be such a place as to host interviews and possibly even live or archived performances. Other stations do this, and there’s no reason I can’t either.
*Expanding my audio/visual skills I’m a member of local public-access network PhillyCAM, which have taught me usage of camera and lighting along with building a production. I have 2 projects that I want to get off the ground and have sought help in making this happen. One of those projects does involve Radio Crystal Blue.
*Reviewing and contributing to the live music/general art scene here in Philly metro area In the last 18 months, around Philadelphia, I have attended a number of events doing this work, all on my own dime, no pay expected, to share with you on this website and elsewhere. I love doing photos, video, interviews at live events. I have a good eye as a photographer, tho I don’t have the professional equipment that others have. I’m further seeking a situation where I can do this for pay as well.
*New Age work. There are several classes that I wish to take for the betterment of my own health and well-being, along with my drive to provide healing for others. I’ve been recommended to study Reiki and Reconnective Healing. I also have a personal interest in studying Tantric healing. I sometimes meet with a group in Philadelphia for meditation and healing. Some of you know already know of my abilities in this area. Out of a series of traumatic experiences in the mid-90’s, I discovered my natural healing abilities, and became certified as a Magnified Healing practitioner 15 years ago. I even had a practice. I am certain that, given the proper time and place, and resources alongsides, I can build up this practice again and contribute more on this level. Being of a rather sensitive nature, I find healing as something deeply meaningful.
One inspiring quote comes from Law of Emergence practitioner Derek Rydall. “Whatever’s missing is what you are not giving”. How about that! When I read that quote, I think to how I’ve slowly backed away from all the work I’ve done beyond job hunting, all the shows I’ve attended in Philly for purposes of review, the classes at PhillyCAM that I’ve stopped taking, and even sometimes not committing as much to the ‘new age’ group as many times per month as before. I even stopped shopping my show/studio idea.
Why?
I keep looking at finances as the big matter.
I keep looking at how much a class costs and what I will gain from that.
I keep wondering how I can give my gifts after x amount of $ is spent, and I’m not sure I can envision it strongly enough.
At times, I’ve had to email people, and approach others in person to be heard for my ideas, and I often been ignored, or shot down, or I discover something in a personality I don’t like, and I don’t work with that person.
Or I find that the classes are too costly or time-consuming.
Excuses, all of them.
What should I expect happen if I do give up any hope that these goals could be met?
I choose not to see eviction as a fait accompli. I still believe there is a company that will hire me shortly before eviction comes to pass, if and when it does.
I am learning not to make finances a big issue, as much as I may have been conditioned for this to be so. The fact is, as Derek suggests with the above quote, if I do not give of the gifts inside me, knowing that I am capable of them, then that itself is a great tragedy. If I know I can bring more joy and love to people, through radio, audio/video techniques, healing, and so forth, as outlined by my goals, then I must continue on this path.
I must commit to myself and to others that it will be so, and therefore have it be so. The more I do this work, and align with my goals, the more my consciousness will support right along with it, and bring about the outward changes, from inside. Yes, it happens inwardly first and NOT from the outside first. This is one important matter about the Law of Emergence. For more, read this
So that is my vision, not a tell-a-vision. It is, indeed a channel. And as I channel these words and this wisdom from within, I do want to believe that things are OK and I am surviving and even thriving. On the outer, there is no question that things must get balanced out. What I seek not only is balance outside but balance inside. I seek the opportunity to make my goals into absolute living reality and for my life and my consciousness to flow along with them.
If you share at all in my vision, and see beyond any excuse I make, and am willing to help make the above goals a reality, including providing work, thank you.
And if you’re willing to donate, the Paypal button is at the homepage.
radiocrystalblue 